Month: July 2022

Present Tension

Posted on by Marko

Living in the present starts with the fundamental belief that you can change now. Now exists, the future does not, the past has passed. The first is real, the other two are either fantasy or history. The first anchors you to life, the other two remove you from it.

Since our language describes our relationship to the world, we can start embracing the present there. Instead of having three strictly defined temporal tenses, let’s reduce them to two: Present Expressed and Present Expressing. Both are real-time, both describe life as it naturally flows, but neither pins you to a point in history or anticipation of future events. Imagine that both tenses describe a natural evolution of the universe, in which you participate in your own authentic, natural manner. If you need labels, you can call it grace, destiny, fate or whatever else points you toward that process. As the universe unfolds, so does time – time measured not through minutes or seconds, but through changes in and around us. Those changes that have taken place are part of Present Expressed, a tense describing the form and course that the universe has naturally taken. The Present Expressing represents the continual evolution of the universe and our participation in it. We are all variables within this tense, and we all matter, so long as we embrace our authenticity. Through or without it, we steer the evolution of the universe to some infinitesimal degree.

The right behaviour is authentic behavior, and this behaviour expresses itself through our continual decisions. Don’t ask yourself if this is the right thing to do – ask yourself if this is the authentic thing to do. Are you acting from within or out of fear or imposed duty? The form that our lives, and by extension the universe (sum total of every life and everything), assume after an authentically expressed decision, will be natural and right, because it comes from a natural place. Think of yourself as an element, like oxygen or helium. Each element behaves in its own, unique way because of its nature, and yet together they hold the universe together and are part of its continual evolution.

Idolatry of Seriousness

Posted on by Marko

Nothing matters, and everything matters. Taking things too seriously is another form of idolatry – it narrows your life down to their scope, which gives them control over you. This can be anything from a person to an activity to an objective or an object. Having these idols of seriousness strips your life and personality of spark, and stimulates fervent craving, frustration and impatience. The infinite totality of your surroundings and inner potential is reduced to a few markers you worship as being absolute truths or boundaries. You live to feel safe, not to enjoy life. Ironically, too much seriousness produces fear, dependence, and emotional volatility. It spans the same spectrum as dogmatic religion – you are easily offended, and in return, are liberal with your offenses to defend those things you deem too serious, too holy, even if you don’t label them as such.

What liberates and enlightens is this moment, any moment, as long as you are present within it. It is everything because it is real, it is your life at present. This synchronicity of reality and awareness matters, because it aligns you with life as it unfolds. When you are aligned, you make more informed decisions, because they come from within (moment’s grace), not without (idols of seriousness). One way to cultivate the moment is to balance thinking with feeling, and then sprinkle it with playfulness. Overthinking produces projections, and with them, expectations and disappointments. It also encourages rigid, scripted behaviour, which gives few rewards in life beyond ticking check-boxes of acceptable behaviour and feeling safe. Life demands spark to keep on evolving: the unexpected, the spontaneous, the playful. These are the catalysts that motivate and move us forward – they express our inner potential, and help us evolve.

Ultimately, most situations we deem serious are reminders that we are trapped, that we have gripped certain elements in our life too tightly, and can’t let go. We can feel this intuitively and directly. It is a feeling of anxiety, as if something is gnawing at our heart, trying to reduce or contain it. This awareness alone is enough to loosen the grip, because you can pinpoint its source. To disarm it, try doing something unexpected, or adding some humour to the situation. The effect may not be instant, but it’ll give you the space to move forward.

Genuine Disobedience

Posted on by Marko

You cannot make a connection with those who seek validation, followers, or spotlight. There is no space for the whole of you, just your obedience. You are their ego fodder or accessory, not a person, not a friend. If you care about those people, the best thing you can do is challenge them. Or at least stand up for your beliefs and opinions, no matter how hard they try to steamroll over them. If they persist, walk away. Relationships are built on agreements and differences, glue and fertilizer. Both should be respected and explored – they are the premise and promise of a human connection.

Strength

Posted on by Marko

Strength is expressing your feelings, not burying them.
Strength is acknowledging hurt, not deflecting or hurting back.
Strength is empathy, not possession.
Strength is gentleness, not aggression.
Strength is encouragement, not intimidation.
Strength is sharing privilege, not accumulating it.
Strength is authenticity, not validation.
Strength is vulnerability, not status.
Strength comes from your heart, not your muscle.

Tasting Passion

Posted on by Marko

Passion comes in two primary flavours:

  1. ambition, the self-serving kind that spawns cravings, expectations, and isolation
  2. compassion, the selfless kind that builds connection and brings happiness.

Like most things, it has two poles, and a wide spectrum in-between. Both poles pull you and provide motivation, but build different outcomes.

Lens of Reality

Posted on by Marko

Belief is the most powerful force in our lives, because it shapes our reality. It influences how we see the world, others, ourselves. We give our independance and authority to someone else because we believe they know better. We let religions, corporations, and governments indocternate us with their interests because we believe they mean to do well for us. Belief is so profoundly immersive that we rarely register when these “well-intended” iterests become crusades, exploitation, and nationalism. The abnormal become the norm because we let them, because we believe in the potential of an authority’s planted seed. And when it sprouts, it entangles us, intoxicates us, and assimilates us. A new, poorer reality, one painted by dependence and insecurity, is born, and we live it. We become trapped in it.

Guard your beliefs and you will preserve authority over your own life. Make symbiotic connections with others but don’t let their labels, titles, or charisma influence who you become. Authenticity empowers us, and societies, by bringing an individual out of a number. By embracing uniqueness over conformation, we embrace inventiveness, empathy, and stronger bonds between each other and the planet.

Shift your beliefs and you will shift your reality. Shift your beliefs and you will lift your self-imposed limitations.

Humorous Permission

Posted on by Marko

We seem to be most authentic when wrapping information we wish to communicate in humour. It can be a thought-out joke, or a haha or an emoji appended to an end of a pseudo-serious sentence, but ultimately there is some sort of truth or genuine feeling being communicated. Humour gives us permission to be honest and vulnerable, because it incorporates an insurance policy. If the information wrapped in a joke becomes too serious or offensive, we can always claim we were trying to be funny.

Keys to Life

Posted on by Marko

There have been many times where I’ve achieved much but still felt unfulfilled. The objective was reached, but the journey of pursuing that objective stopped. After several deeper, vulnerable conversations with my heart, I’ve realized that the process of living is like life – it needs to evolve. To unlock and sustain that evolution – the life itself – living needs new gates opened. New pastures to explore, graze, grow upon, play in, and add to. Three such gate keys are:

  1. Insistence on continually challenging and breaking established and forming habits
  2. Protecting the present moment by defending it from rumination (being possessed by memories) and excessive sentimentality
  3. Backing up thought with action (manifesting life)

Further reflection led to the realization that the gates these three keys unlock are interconnected, like gears of some life-stopping mechanism. They each remove the living aspect of life, making it static (less alive). Through practice, I’ve discovered that you don’t have to unlock all three simultaneously to enjoy a more fulfilling life. If you unlock any one of them, the other two are less effective at confining you, making the total escape easier and self-fulfilling.

Pathos of Ownership

Posted on by Marko

To own is to suffer. To own is to grasp and crave, endlessly, unceasingly. Ownership is attachment, a practice that is widespread, and oftentimes, pathologically encouraged. To obsessively accumulate until we are bogged down, physically and mentally, in the futile pursuit of security and validation. The idea of ownership is a human construct, though perhaps a more accurate word is man-made, considering modern civilization was built on an unbalanced, testosterone-directed patriarchy. On the most basic level, ownership is a form of aggression, a fruitless conquest of an insecure ego over material.

The compulsion of ownership is self-perpetuating, since you cannot truly own anything, not permanently anyways. If you cannot own a moment, an essential unit of time and space, you cannot own anything material borne out of it either. Like all moments, material things pass. Intuitively, we know this, but instead of continuing to move forward, taking as much as we need, we obsess over our future security. We start hoarding things, en masse. We start measuring and comparing each other on how much we’ve accumulated, and take pride in owning more – or shame in owning less.

Ultimately, the mechanism of ownership reaches a point where its internal relationship inverses. Our imagined security becomes so dependant on the idea of accumulation that the things we think we own now own us. They consume us and run our thoughts, actions, and ultimately, lives.

You don’t need to own something to benefit from it. Enduring societies and ecosystems are built on networks of sharing, not hoarding. Your own body exists, and thrives, because trillions of its cells are reciprocating. And when they are not, you get sick.