Tag: independence

Of Needs and Independence

Posted on by Marko

There is a difference between what we want and what we need. Wants are often intellectual pursuits, many of which are prescribed to us through social norms, ideologies, expectations, and our own ego. Needs are different. Needs upwell from within. We discover them through a non-craving attraction that feels as natural as breathing. It is through needs that we uncover ourselves, that we feel purpose, and motivation. That we feel alive.

One of the needs that seems to be universal is the need to be independent but connected. Expressing our unique voice but listening to other voices as well, with equal respect. Understanding that we are one of many sharing the same space-time, trying to figure out how we fit in. Communication is a bi-directional exchange of idea, feelings, perspectives. It is not preaching or having it your way. Nor is it being passive or conforming, and having someone have it their way.  Communication is a connection that unites us, and us to an even greater whole.

Through this authentic connection we benefit as individuals as well as groups. Like molecules within a lattice, each unique but strengthening the other, building up a structure whose whole exceeds the sum of its individual parts. Living things are made of molecules but possess an awareness, a consciousness that cannot be understood or measured by examining molecules alone. Being a filament within this greater identity is what we deeply yearn for, what we need, but don’t know how to pursue.

Try taking without expecting, then giving without indebting. Or the reverse. Either way, you’re planting seeds of connection.  For independence and individuality without connection is loneliness, and that is one thing none of us want, but most of us have.

Idolatry of Seriousness

Posted on by Marko

Nothing matters, and everything matters. Taking things too seriously is another form of idolatry – it narrows your life down to their scope, which gives them control over you. This can be anything from a person to an activity to an objective or an object. Having these idols of seriousness strips your life and personality of spark, and stimulates fervent craving, frustration and impatience. The infinite totality of your surroundings and inner potential is reduced to a few markers you worship as being absolute truths or boundaries. You live to feel safe, not to enjoy life. Ironically, too much seriousness produces fear, dependence, and emotional volatility. It spans the same spectrum as dogmatic religion – you are easily offended, and in return, are liberal with your offenses to defend those things you deem too serious, too holy, even if you don’t label them as such.

What liberates and enlightens is this moment, any moment, as long as you are present within it. It is everything because it is real, it is your life at present. This synchronicity of reality and awareness matters, because it aligns you with life as it unfolds. When you are aligned, you make more informed decisions, because they come from within (moment’s grace), not without (idols of seriousness). One way to cultivate the moment is to balance thinking with feeling, and then sprinkle it with playfulness. Overthinking produces projections, and with them, expectations and disappointments. It also encourages rigid, scripted behaviour, which gives few rewards in life beyond ticking check-boxes of acceptable behaviour and feeling safe. Life demands spark to keep on evolving: the unexpected, the spontaneous, the playful. These are the catalysts that motivate and move us forward – they express our inner potential, and help us evolve.

Ultimately, most situations we deem serious are reminders that we are trapped, that we have gripped certain elements in our life too tightly, and can’t let go. We can feel this intuitively and directly. It is a feeling of anxiety, as if something is gnawing at our heart, trying to reduce or contain it. This awareness alone is enough to loosen the grip, because you can pinpoint its source. To disarm it, try doing something unexpected, or adding some humour to the situation. The effect may not be instant, but it’ll give you the space to move forward.

Lens of Reality

Posted on by Marko

Belief is the most powerful force in our lives, because it shapes our reality. It influences how we see the world, others, ourselves. We give our independance and authority to someone else because we believe they know better. We let religions, corporations, and governments indocternate us with their interests because we believe they mean to do well for us. Belief is so profoundly immersive that we rarely register when these “well-intended” iterests become crusades, exploitation, and nationalism. The abnormal become the norm because we let them, because we believe in the potential of an authority’s planted seed. And when it sprouts, it entangles us, intoxicates us, and assimilates us. A new, poorer reality, one painted by dependence and insecurity, is born, and we live it. We become trapped in it.

Guard your beliefs and you will preserve authority over your own life. Make symbiotic connections with others but don’t let their labels, titles, or charisma influence who you become. Authenticity empowers us, and societies, by bringing an individual out of a number. By embracing uniqueness over conformation, we embrace inventiveness, empathy, and stronger bonds between each other and the planet.

Shift your beliefs and you will shift your reality. Shift your beliefs and you will lift your self-imposed limitations.

Democracy: Promise & Practice

Posted on by Marko

The concept of democracy is a noble one, but I don’t think we’ve evolved or matured enough to implement it within our society. Greed and self-interest still rule nations, from political parties to influential individuals alike. These privileged groups put their needs ahead of the people, try hard to coerce us to see their selfish plight, with the real objective of getting our votes. Oftentimes, they rely on the tried and tested methods of fear-mongering, which produces the desired effect of dependence. From religions to governments, they want us to see them as our salvation, and all they ask for is our voice. So choosing governance in many so-called democratic nations is less about what people want and more about what interest groups want, with the help of an indoctrinated population. This swings left and right depending on how successful indoctrination campaigns are. There have been monarchs who held a closer ear to people’s needs than many political parties nowadays, in part because they could not lose their power. The envisioned concept of democracy does not revolve around gaining and accumulating power, but sharing it. We’ve made strides towards that promise since the Age of Enlightenment, but perhaps we can accelerate it by removing ideological and purely intellectual labels that ultimately divide us. We are not just liberals, conservatives, libertarians – we are a bit of everything in different proportions. We are unique but complete individuals with innate common values. Values like independence, compassion, empathy, collaboration, and insatiable desire for strong, symbiotic social bonds. Values that seek to connect people, and not condition them into political fodder for the privileged few.